Granted. The Donald skipped American history class—along with much else that even modestly educated people still recall.
But owing to his late life conversion to flag-hugging patriotism you would think he might have taken time to actually read the Declaration of Independence.
Obviously not. We have scoured its 1334 words, and our recollection was fully vindicated. To wit, there is not a single mention of armed might, military exploits, unfurled flags, marching bands, battle hymns or occupied airports (sic!) etc.